


Paya's Journey

by Lleu (Gyffes)



Category: The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms, The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-01-09
Packaged: 2021-03-12 09:48:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28508469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gyffes/pseuds/Lleu
Summary: During a monthly dinner with Link, Paya is shocked when Impa requests Link to show her more of Hyrule outside the borders of Kakariko. Thrown into a terrifying new world, she fights with herself to confront her weaknesses in the hopes of pleasing her grandmother, Link, and herself.
Comments: 5
Kudos: 12





	1. Chapter 1

There is an art to serving a meal properly.

I hear that outside of our village, many people have forgotten this. That they treat meals as a passing attraction, even a nuisance, and they do not recognize the blessing of food.

I was determined that our household, at least, would not forget. Especially not for this meal. Master Link had come for his monthly visit, and I was determined to show him that we do things properly in Kakariko.

That _I_ do things properly.

Cado helped me carry the meal into Impa's house. Link sat talking to grandmother at her seat below the staircase. He wore the same simple tunic as when I had first met him. I wondered what had happened to his royal blue attire. I had not seen him wear it since Ganon fell. He still wore his weapons, though. The Master Sword hung from his back as naturally as I might wear a hair clip.

I hurried in to set the table, staying low and inconspicuous as I could, praying he would not look up and see the blush rising on my cheeks. Such thoughts as I had were not suitable of an honored guest.

I began to arrange the table as Cado went out to fetch the rest of the dishes. It was to be a simple meal of fish and rice, but the proper setting could turn the simple into something sacred.

I placed each dish with care. The tail of the fish—a Sanke carp from grandmother's pond—pointed outward, and the plate sat just to the right side of the mat. Except for Link's, who ate with his left hand. I couldn't help but smile as I adjusted his plate to the left. Even if he failed to notice my alteration, he would still have a more pleasant meal for it.

Cado returned with the rice bowl and a pot of strong green tea. I placed the rice just in the center of the table, where everyone could reach it, and completed the work by pouring out the tea into three cups. The pot went beside the guest's mat, spout pointing carefully toward the door.

Grandmother must have been watching. As soon as I was done she led Link to the table. He unstrapped his sword, and placed it beside his mat, a sign of the peace, and trust in our guard outside. Grandmother knelt at the head of the table, and then Link and I followed suit. Feeling another smile rising, I covered my mouth with a hand. The first time Link had dined with us, he had sat down first.

He scooped some rice from the center bowl onto his plate—the guest should eat first, of course—and the meal began without incident.

"Mmm this is good rice, Paya," Link said through a mouthful of food. "Thanks!"

I winced. "Master Link, _please_ ," I said. But please what? How can you just tell someone he is being, well, _uncivilized_? And not just anyone, but the savior of Hyrule?

As always, Grandmother had the situation in hand. A touch on his arm, a soft word, and then Link looked down and swallowed.

"Aw, I've ruined it again, haven't I?" He had a special way of seeming confidant and in control, even while staring bashfully down at his plate. "I never knew eating could be so involved. I'm lucky I have a good teacher."

He looked up and smiled at me, and I nearly melted. Did he realize what power his grin had? Only Grandmother's breathing exercises allowed me to maintain any semblance of composure.

"Link, how have you been keeping busy now that Ganon is defeated?" Grandmother asked. "Any new ventures?"

Link finished chewing and swallowed. "Wait and see, I guess." He shrugged, leaned forward with an elbow on the table, then jerked back up into a better posture. "A Rito minstrel is teaching me the lute when we have time. Maybe I'll find some skill in that. There is much less music in the land than I remember."

I covered my face again. Link as a musician? How could he be anything but the rugged swordsman he was? I scolded myself as I fought to regain control. Music was a noble art, and it was very impolite to laugh at a guest.

My mirth subsided as I slowed my breathing, and then I could resume the meal.

"And what of Princess Zelda?" Impa prodded. "Have you heard any word from her?"

Link had been about to take another bite, but he lowered the food to his plate and turned to face Impa more fully. I found myself listening carefully for his answer, despite myself.

"Zelda will make herself known if she wants to. Last she told me, she was through with the burdens of royalty, and as far as I'm concerned she should stay done." His voice had taken a subtle edge to it, almost enough to be commanding. Then it softened again. "She's happier this way."

"You both must need a rest after all the work you've done," I added. I could speak around him without stumbling over my words now. Mostly. When he wasn't looking at me too closely, anyway.

"If you are not otherwise engaged, I hoped I might ask you a favor," Grandmother said.

Link nodded for her to continue.

"My granddaughter is young. Too young for this old village. It would do her good to see what lies outside our borders. Might you show her what this land of Hyrule has to offer?"

I sat up even straighter. "Grandmother!"

"I'd be happy to," Link said at the same time. "What do you think, Paya? Where would you like to go?"

My heart pounded so hard I could hear it thumping. I could not just deny Grandmother. But a journey outside Kakariko! Alone with Link? It was too much. Too much to take in.

"Well, I-" I stammered. Both Grandmother and LInk were looking at me, expectant. I had to say something. "I have been curious to see Fort Hateno," I said at last. I don't think my voice broke. Too badly.

I realized as soon as I said it that it had been a mistake. Link looked down at his plate, his eyes a little less eager. Fort Hateno was where he had died, and I was asking him to go back.

But then he looked up and he was all cheer once again. "Great idea, Paya! We can leave tomorrow, if you're ready."

I nodded.

There was no escape.


	2. Chapter 2

I paced about my room, trying not to shake. Why was Grandmother doing this to me? Had I displeased her? I took my journal out of my pack for the third time. Surely I would not be able to write anything while on the road.

I sat down on my bed and dug my fingers into the sheets. I was so frustrated, I almost wanted to punch the bag. I threw away the thought immediately. I could solve my problems _without_ violence.

But how? What did Grandmother want of me? I put my journal back in my pack. I would need it on the journey to keep my thoughts centered, and it didn't take up that much room anyway.

Oh, I was being silly. It was clear what she thought of me. I was weak. Link had been coming by for months now and I still could not talk to him without making a fool of myself. I allowed an heirloom to be stolen, and she thought I needed _comfort_ rather than the scolding I deserved. She probably thought I was too weak to handle it. Yes, Paya, a grown woman, a Sheikah "warrior" needs to be coddled like a child.

I felt my jaw clenching. My face hurt from the strain. I eased my mouth open and again worked through Grandmother's breathing exercises. They helped, some. I felt a little less tight. I could think a little bit.

I tried to busy myself with packing to avoid my thoughts running astray again. I'd need a couple of changes of clothes, of course. I folded them up and put them in, only to realize my journal was now buried at the bottom. I fished it out and placed it beside the pack on the bed. I could pack it at the end if there was enough space for it.

I eyed my dagger. It was largely ceremonial. A gift from Cado and Dorian on my thirteenth birthday. It would be good to be armed. People took weapons when they went outside the village, in case monsters attacked. I drew the knife from its sheath and looked at the metal blade, wondering how sharp it was. I was quick with a knife, at least when it came to chopping vegetables. But it would have to do.

Grandmother was right, I decided as I placed the dagger atop my folded clothes. She always was. I was weak, and I would need strength to be a proper Sheikah. And what better person to teach it to me than the strongest man in Hyrule?

I still didn't feel good about it. When I asked my heart, it screamed back "NO!" But there was no getting out of this journey, and so I committed to learning the lessons grandmother would have me learn. I would sleep well, and rise early, and walk boldly into my doom.

* * *

It turned out rather than walking boldly, I would be riding unsteadily. He had ridden his horse to Kakariko, a great stallion of a pure white color. I had no horse of my own. I didn't even know how to ride. So Link just helped me into the saddle and led the horse by a lead line as I got used to the new rocking motion atop the horse.

It was all going well until the horse just stopped in the middle of the trail. Link looked back.

"Oh, someone's being moody today, aren't we?" he said to the horse. "That's alright. Paya, just give him a bit of a kick in the ribs with your heels there. He'll get going again."

I tried. I really did. My legs were spread so wide it was awkward to angle my feet in, but eventually I worked it out and gave the horse a little tap with my heels. The horse stayed where he was.

"A bit harder," Link said. "Don't think he felt that one."

I kicked again. It was easier this time, now I had the right angle. The horse still didn't move. I could feel myself start to breathe faster. _Calm down, Paya_. I told myself. _You'll get it. Just pretend Link isn't standing right there watching you fail_.

"Don't worry about hurting him, he's a big fella," Link said. "Come on, show me the hardest kick you've got."

Well, he did ask for it. I extended my legs forward to wind up and then drove them back, as hard as I could. I saw Link's eyes widen just before my heels connected, but by then it was too late.

The horse bolted forward, with me still astride. It bounced me up so there was wide air between me and the saddle. My teeth clattered together at the sudden jolt, and I cried out at the same time. Then gravity pulled me down, and the horse bounced me right back up.

Link called out something. Something about using my knees. But the wind was rushing past, and my heart was pounding in my ears, and Link was just too far back for me to hear. I fell forward, throwing my arms around the horse's neck, praying that he didn't throw me off. Still the horse bounced me up and down, but now it was even worse. Now I was lying flat on the horse, my whole _body_ was bouncing up and now, and not just my butt. I squeezed my eyes shut and tightened my grip around the horse's neck.

I don't know how long it lasted, but eventually the horse slowed back down to a walk. Link came running up from behind, calling out to it.

"You okay, Paya?" he said, taking the horse by the lead again and patting its snout.

I shook my head. I swung my leg over the side of the horse, and Link helped me down. My legs turned to jelly as they hit the ground. I began to fall, but Link caught me. Held me. I couldn't believe I was this close to him! But I knew he wasn't holding me like _that_. He was holding me like a timid girl who had just failed her first riding lesson and was too scared to stand on her own.

We switched after that. I walked beside him while he rode. We didn't talk much. What would he have to say to me, after all? But after lunch I asked for a chance to ride again.

"You sure?" Link said.

I nodded. "If I'm going with you, I think I should learn to do this," I said. A complete sentence, no stammering. I didn't say that I couldn't bear for him to see me fail at the very first thing I tried to do, and then give up after only one setback. That I was merely _timid_ , not _weak_.

Riding was actually pleasant, once I found the rhythm of it. Being so much higher off the ground made me feel more powerful, in a way. The horse had a soothing rhythm about its gait, even if it did chafe at my thighs a little.

Then the horse stopped again.

"Why are you so stubborn today, huh?" Link asked. He looked up at me. "Think you can kick him back into a walk? Maybe a little gentler this time."

I took a deep breath. I was _not_ ready to be bounced like a flour sack again, but I knew if I thought about it too long, I would never work up the courage to follow through. I gave it a sharp kick in the ribs, and the horse started back into its walk.

"Good, Paya!" Link said. "Horses are smart animals. You just need to learn the right way to talk to them."

I smiled at the praise, as simple as it was.

We switched places twice more before we stopped for the day. I hadn't expected riding to be so tiresome, but I guess I wasn't used to using my muscles that way. I wasn't used to using my muscles to walk all day either. I could already tell that I would be quite sore in the morning.

While Link rubbed down his horse, I excused myself into the brush and discreetly eased down my pants. As I expected, my thighs had been rubbed red. I gave myself a small massage, wincing as I touched it, but not too long. It wouldn't do to have Link come looking for me, and then find me like _that_!

Dinner was some roasted vegetables and mushrooms.

"Sorry it's not much," Link said. "We'll get to Dueling Peaks stable tomorrow. We'll have a proper meal there."

I tried not to let my disappointment show. Lunch had been meager too. I guess I'd have to get used to being a little hungry.

Still, it was a meal and worth doing properly, even if it was just a small handful of food in the middle of nowhere. I blessed it with an ancient prayer and forced myself to eat it at a measured pace. The gods would understand if I did not leave a small morsel for them this time.

I slept on Link's bedroll. I had not thought to bring anything to sleep on and was quite flustered about it until Link insisted that his guest ought to have the better gear. After that, I could only accept graciously.

Honestly, I don't see how sleeping on the ground could have been worse. The open air was full of noises: rustles leaves, the _coo_ of owls, crickets. My thin blanket did little to keep out the chill, and my stomach was still complaining about the small meals that day. I did manage to fall asleep eventually, somehow. Then the next day we were up with the sun and preparing for the next leg of the journey.

I took some time to stretch out my sore legs while Link readied the horse. They did not want to stretch very far that morning, but I did what I could. Then, though there were no idols to attend to, I sent a small prayer to the ancestors from my heart. I didn't know who would see to the idols with me gone. Perhaps Grandmother would assign Cado and Dorian to the task. Or Koko would be a good choice. She had taken an interest lately, and I had taught her some of the minor rituals.

Link was waiting for me when I finished. There was no impatience in his face, but I could tell by the way he was standing, holding the horse's reins in one hand. He was ready to go, and I was delaying him. I hurried over. I don't like slowing things down, but the gods and ancestors are owed their due as well.

The second day passed much the same as the first. We alternated riding and walking in dull, awkward silence. He could have gone so much faster if not for me. I couldn't help but wonder what he was thinking. Why he was even bothering with me. Perhaps we were both beholden to Grandmother's will. Her voice seemed gentle enough when you first met her, but believe me there's a spirit of iron underneath!

Shortly after lunch, Link pointed out the top of the stable looming over the trees in the distance. He suggested we stop there, and I was elated at the thought of a break and a proper bed again. Even though it had only just been one day so far. We pressed forward again—me on horseback, him on foot—when a merchant approached us.

"Good day sir, ma'am," he said with a smile.

Something shifted in Link's stance. I couldn't explain how, but he somehow seemed much more dangerous, like a large cat coiled up and ready to pounce.

The merchant didn't seem to notice, however. "Do you know where I might find Dueling Peaks Stable?" he asked.

"Your king is dead. Don't throw away your life." Link's voice was _cold_. I had never dreamed he could sound so terrifying.

For a long moment, neither of them moved. Then the merchant sprang forward, and the rest happened too fast for me to track. It ended with Link standing over a dismembered corpse, cleaning the blood off his sword.

I held in a shriek. I had seen death before. I prepared the departed for their final voyage. But nothing ever so violent, so gruesome. Shaking, I lowered myself to the ground. "What…. What-?"

"Yiga," Link said. He turned the merchant's face towards me with his boot. There was no face at all. It was completely covered in a white mask bearing the Eye of Truth.

"But Ganon is dead! Kohga is dead," I said.

Link nodded. "It would seem some remain loyal to the cause." He sheathed his clean sword. "Come, we're almost to the stables. We can rest there."

I didn't move. "I… I need to send him off first. You go ahead, Master Link. I can catch up."

He turned his head. "Paya…" I could see the puzzlement in his eyes, knew he thought I was being silly.

I stayed firm. "M-Master Link, _please_! I have to d-do this." I swallowed. Here I was, contradicting Link. The Hero of Hyrule. Princess Zelda's personal guard. The man who had just slain a Yiga warrior as casually as I might clean a fish.

"I know you don't think this is important, but I do," I said. "Someone has to lay his soul to rest, and there is no one else here to do it." I prayed he couldn't see just how tense and scared I was in that moment. My legs were shaking, but maybe that was just from riding and walking all day.

Link smiled again. "Well if it's important to you, you'd best see to it," he said. "Let me know if I can be of any help."

"Thank you, Master Link," I said, bowing to him. "I can prepare the body. If you could dig out a small grave?" Suddenly, I found it much easier to talk. This was what I knew best after all. I even asked Link for help, and he nodded and _began digging_!

I turned to the body. All those thoughts flew out of my head as I began cleaning it. There was a lot to clean. Blood had gotten everywhere. I didn't try to get it out of his clothing. Maybe if we were in Kakariko. Maybe in Kakariko we could have found something to do about the arm as well. But we were here, and we did not have days to prepare the funeral, and we would make do.

The important part was the face. Or the mask, rather. I did not know Yiga customs, but the mask seemed important, so I left it on. Fortunately, I had packed some cleaning rags, and the undried blood came off easily enough with some water. Then I moved to the rest of the skin, anything not covered up by his clothing, and patted it clean.

By the time I finished, Link had dug up a spot near the side of the road. It was shallow, but I couldn't ask for more in the circumstances. At least it was far enough from the road that horses wouldn't be trampling over him every day. Link helped me carry him over and lower him inside.

"I wish I had brought incense," I said. It was not just highly symbolic of the soul rising to the heavens; it also did a good deal to cover up the smell.


	3. Chapter 3

Link checked his horse in at the stable, and then we were free the rest of the day. I sorely needed a bath. I had handled death and needed to purify, not to mention the two days of traveling in the same set of clothing.

When I brought it up to Link, he pointed me at a nearby pond. A good distance, but not too far. I hesitated, unsure how to voice my concerns.

"Ah, you're worried about privacy," Link said. "I think they keep a screen in the stables, hang on."

In a few moments, he re-emerged from the stable with a folding screen under his arm. We walked together to the pond.

"Don't worry, I'll keep watch for you," Link said. "It'll be open on the other end, but that's just a mountain. No one's ever really out that way. And then I could sure use a bath too."

Link set up the screen for me, then I knelt behind it to unpack. I had brought a bar of soap, as well as a change of clothes and a small towel. I hesitated before undressing. It just felt so open and exposed. Usually Cado or Dorian would ferry buckets of water into a private tub for me. Completely enclosed.

I pulled off my shirt. The wind across my so-rarely-exposed skin emphasized how vulnerable I was here. I shuddered. The wind was _cold_ , too. But it had to be done, and with Link standing guard on the other side of the screen, it was okay to be vulnerable. At least that's what I told myself as I undressed the rest of the way and stepped into the brisk water.

There was nothing refreshing or luxurious about _this_ bath. I lathered the soap on as quickly as I could manage and rinsed it right back off again. I needed to get back into my clothes, and more importantly, get _warm_.

My teeth were still chattering after I had toweled myself off and dressed. I must have looked a sopping wet pathetic mess as I emerged from behind the screen, arms crossed against the cold.

"I left you the soap, if you need it," I told Link. Then it was his turn, while I waited on the other side.

He did not seem to be in the same sort of hurry. I even thought I heard him swimming around a bit. At least he was able to enjoy it, a bit. Maybe it was just something that came with time and exposure.

As we walked back, I broached a subject that had been growing on my mind for the last few hours.

"Master Link?"

"Paya, please just call me Link," he said. I blushed. This was not the first time he had corrected me.

"S-sorry, Master Link." There it was again. Some habits were just hard to break. Link seemed to ignore the blunder, and I forced myself to go on. "I was thinking, if another Yiga attacks, it would be helpful if I knew how to fight."

At first, I thought he didn't hear me or was ignoring me. He walked on in silence a good space. Then he sighed.

"I don't think that would help," he said. "You're not a fighter, Paya."

"The Sheikah are great warriors!" I protested. "The Royal family calls upon us to guard their sacred relics, and-"

Link stopped. He took me by the shoulders and looked down into my eyes. I couldn't look away from the determination and sorrow I saw there.

" _You_ are not a fighter," he said again.

I understood. He thought I was too weak. And maybe he was right.

We spent the rest of the walk back in silence. I wasn't anxious anymore. I was _awkward_ and embarrassed, and I almost wished Link would accidentally forget me in the morning and ride off on his own.

I bought my own bedroll and a second blanket when we got to the stables, and Link purchased more food.

"I hate cooking," Link admitted as he began to boil water in a cooking pot outside. "But I have to eat to live, and I have to cook to eat, so may as well get good at it, yeah?" He stirred some noodles into the pot, along with a tab of butter.

"Sometimes you have to fight to live too," I said, trying again. Grandmother sent me out to toughen me up, and I was not going to disappoint her. While I waited for him to respond, I grabbed the carrots he had set beside him and began peeling them.

He stirred the noodles quietly. I was ready for him to embarrass me again. It would hurt less this time. And then less after that. And eventually he would see I was serious and give in.

"I guess the first principle of combat is to know yourself," he said. "If you know yourself, if you know your enemy, you need not fear the outcome of a hundred battles."

I thought about this for a bit. It was not the sort of lesson I had in mind.

"For example?" I prompted.

"Bokoblins are strong and fierce. If you try to fight one head-to-head, strength-for-strength, it will kill you nine times out of ten. Now, you have a good eye, and you can move silently. If you shoot them from behind, especially at night, you will have a much better time of it. Or if you travel with a well-armed guard, they will be too cowardly to attack, and you need not worry about Bokoblins at all."

I added the chopped carrots to the pot. "But that's not really fighting though, is it?"

"Yes, it is," Link said. He tapped his head. "Battles are won and lost up here, before they start. If you draw your sword and charge a Bokoblin camp, then you've already lost, no matter how well-trained you are. Fight on _your_ terms. Not mine. Not theirs."

His answer was hardly satisfying, but I couldn't find room to argue with it either.

Our dinner was more filling, as he promised, and the extra rock salt I bought from the stable helped too. It wasn't as good as I would make back home, but it was a welcome change from the sparse bits of baked vegetables we had eaten up until then.

We set out early the next morning. Link had exchanged his white horse for a massive black creature that was nearly too big to even be called a horse. He was large enough to seat both of us together. I rode behind, my arms wrapped around Link to stay steady.

The going was faster this way, and before too long I had caught the rhythm of the horse's gait and rode along more easily. We crossed a bridge and reached Fort Hateno when it was still morning. Not even the bright morning sun could make this place seem welcoming. The ruined barricades, the lines burnt through the walls, the field of defunct Guardians were grim reminders of the carnage that happened here.

It was eerie to see it in person. I had only heard the stories before. Even Pikango was unwilling to paint it for me. "Some things, my brush is not enough to capture," he had said. "Maybe someday I will have the skill."

"I had never seen so many Guardians before," Link said in a low voice, almost as though he were talking to himself. "We didn't come here to win. We came to buy time. To defy them. To fight."

"I don't understand," I said. "You told me that if you know yourself and know your enemy-"

He let out a soft chuckle. "We did not _fear_ the outcome. We knew it. Every one of us was going to die." He seemed to notice something on the ground and wandered away. His eyes defocused, as though lost in ancient memories.

I decided to leave him alone. It was my fault he was here, reliving this. I turned away to explore on my own. The ruins were impressive, not just in how great they must have been originally, but also how much the Guardians had damaged them.

I passed through the gates. The overgrown still path was still littered with rusted weapons and armor from the great battle. Then I noticed a small grove off to the side. Something drew me to it. I approach it to find a space filled with idols of every shape. I wandered among them, taking the time to notice each one. Someone had left them here to remember their dead. Someone long ago dead and lost to history.

Well if someone had gone to the trouble to carve out this plot of sacred land, the least I could do was honor it. I knelt amid the idols and added my prayers to the countless nameless ones that had come before.

It rained that night. We huddled together for warmth. Before I left on this journey, I would not have imagined I would ever be unhappy to be in his arms, but all I could focus on was the rain and the cold.

I slept fitfully and rose more tired than before. The rain had lightened some in the night, but it kept coming down. I wrapped my blanket about me in a futile attempt to ward it off as I packed for the day's journey. My head throbbed as I shoved the wet gear in, wondering how I had ever made it fit to begin with.

Before we left, I knew there was something wrong. My head felt a little funny, and a cough rose in my throat that I barely managed to hold in. I was not going to give in though. Grandmother needed me to be strong, so I climbed on the horse behind Link and pretended I was fine.

"Where are we going now?" I asked. We hadn't made any plans other than Fort Hateno.

"There's a mountain just ahead I thought you might like to see. There's a nice view at the top, and a peculiar lake. Hateno's not too far beyond that, so we can rest up and dry off there after."

I nodded. A mountain. I had never been up a mountain before, unless you count the path up to the cliff overlooking Kakariko. If it came as easily as riding a horse, I could live with that.

Still, riding a horse was not feeling as easy that day. The bouncing motion made my stomach feel queasy, and it seemed to bring out the worst of my headache. Fortunately, breakfast had been a few scant bites of hard jerky, so my stomach was mostly empty already. I spent the journey with my eyes closed, head buried in Link's shoulder, trying to think of _anything_ else.

The rain had ceased by the time we dismounted in front of the mountain. At that point, I was too exhausted to care either way. I just wanted to lay down and recover, but I made myself keep going. I put on the neutral, collected expression grandmother had taught me so many years ago, so Link would not see there was anything wrong, and I followed him up the mountain.

I don't know how I made it as far as I did. My head was in a dense haze, and it felt like I was plodding forward on someone else's legs. I don't know how Link never saw I was on the verge of collapse. I don't know how _I_ didn't see it. I should have stopped. Either then, or later when I first noticed my feet slipping on the wet rock. But I had my quest, and I would not let a mountain deter me, so I pressed on, higher and higher until at last there was just no energy left.

My foot landed on the edge of a rock. My ankle twisted, and then my legs no longer supported me.

I screamed as I fell, grasping at nothing as the mountain flew past me.

The next thing I knew, there was a gust of wind, and I was falling the _other way_. And then Link had me in his arms again and we soared all the way to the ground.

I didn't let go, even after we landed. I clenched his tunic in my hand and shook my head.

"I can't do this," I said, shaking and sobbing. It didn't matter that I was crying in front of him. Not anymore. "I'm sick, and I'm tired, and-" my voice broke. I just wanted to go home, whatever happened.

I felt Link's hand on my forehead. "Paya, you're burning up! Why didn't you say anything?"

"Grandmother wants me to be strong. How could I face her if I just give up? But I have to. I can't live like this!"

I don't remember much that happened after that. I think I passed out. There were flashes when I was on a horse. The next thing I really remember, I was waking up in a strange bed. It was dry. That was the first thing I had noticed. Someone had changed me into my other set of clothes.

But what did it matter if I was comfortable now? I had failed. Grandmother and all of Kakariko would know it.

I sank deeper beneath the covers and pretended to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

My recovery passed smoothly. Link brought me soup regularly, and fresh sheets when I had sweated through what I had. He never showed any sign of impatience, I don't know how. Maybe you are beyond that when you're a hero.

He tried to encourage me one day, while we were eating together.

"You must be made of stern stuff to not admit getting sick," he said.

I couldn't believe him though. If he _really_ saw me for what I was, he would have other than nice things to say to me, I was sure of it.

I thanked him politely all the same. I couldn't just dump my sorrows on him because he was being nice, after all.

Distant shouts outside interrupted our conversation. Link was on his feet instantly. I struggled to rise behind him.

"Stay here," he barked.

I waited for him to leave, then continued to get up. I was mostly better now. I was sweating less, and my legs were only a little wobbly. Despite Link's command, I wasn't going to let myself be trapped in a house if there was trouble. I put on my shoes and stepped outside, once I was sure Link was gone.

I found myself on the outskirts of a village. Probably Hateno. Link had told me about it earlier. Across the bridge, in the village proper, flames rose from the rooftops, and more screaming filled the air.

I grabbed the door frame for support. I could not just watch, but what else could I do? Link was right; if I sprinted into a brawl I would just get killed. But maybe there was another option. Maybe I could drag an injured person to safety. Or maybe not. I wouldn't find out just standing there.

I forced myself forward. Across the bridge and into the village. I smelled death and fire, but I kept walking. It somehow didn't matter anymore that I was tired and hungry and unsteady on my feet. I just kept going.

I passed rows of buildings, mostly intact, and then I came to the town's center. Link stood in the middle, cleaning his blade. I guess that meant it was over, if he had lowered his guard like that. The ground was covered in corpses. Some were Yiga. Most were Hylian.

Link looked up at me as I approached, but he seemed content to let me in. There were a few townsmen around him. Some were armed. All appeared shocked and confused. They stared about themselves in a daze, and one wept openly.

I walked up to one of the fallen townspeople. She would have been a beautiful woman, with lush brown hair and a warm smile. No longer.

"Help me," I said to any who would listen. "It is not good for the dead to lie like carrion in the streets."

A man grabbed her by the shoulders, and together we carried her to a clear spot atop a nearby hill. "Fetch tables, whatever you can," I told him after we set her down. "Let us prepare them properly."

I stayed with the woman and began to clean her face. These people would get more care than the fallen Yiga. They would have fresh clothes, and be purified, and return to the Goddess ready to move on.

It wasn't long before others joined me. Some were grieving widows, saying their last farewells as they watched. Some were grim townsmen, coming together to work after the attack. Then the first man came with a table, and others followed, and the dead were prepared off the ground, as was proper. Link did not participate, but stood back, keeping a watchful eye in all directions, hand on his sword, as also was proper.

I left the woman in the care of another villager, then went to check on the others. I showed them the best way to clean the jewelry attached to the body. How to remove an arrow without causing further mutilation.

I sent for clean clothes and a shaving basin, and at each request people rushed to comply. I knew better than to _ask_ anyone to shave the faces of the dead men, but once I began the work, there were people willing to continue it.

Where any wounds remained open, we sewed them shut. We washed off every bit of dirt and blood. We clad them in their finest outfits, arranged to perfection. The whole time, I kept my eye on the sun. They would have to be in the ground by sun-down.

We finished preparing the bodies in plenty of time. Everyone seemed to be looking to me for the next step. I had hardly remembered taking charge; I had just started working and people followed. But that didn't matter now.

"They died defending this village from the Yiga," I said. "Let them rest at the gates, guarding it for eternity."

We dug six graves, three on each side of the road. As the sun lowered further and further, families came up to say good-bye, and to tell the townspeople of the departed. I no longer recall what was said, but I wept over each one.

We buried them at twilight and lit a stick of incense for each grave. My work done, I bowed and walked away, standing with Link as the mourners observed silence while the incense burned. This was not my village, nor his.

When the incense burned away, only the moon remained shining, half-full in the sky. The villagers began to disperse and return to their homes, but one young woman turned away and approached us. Approached _me_.

"You know the old ways. From before the Calamity?" she said. As she spoke, another woman came up to stand behind her.

"I do."

"Please, miss. I'm to be married this week. We'd like to have it done right. The way it used to. If you'll be around," she said.

"And I've a newborn at home," the second woman said. "Is there any blessing you could give him, ma'am?"

"This night is for the dead," I told them. "We can talk of the living in the morning."

They bowed and departed. At last, we were alone. I let myself sag. Link offered me an arm for support, and I gladly took it.

"It sounds like you have work to do here," he said as he helped me back to his house.

"I thought everyone knew the rituals," I admitted. "I guess some things are just obvious with a grandmother like mine."

"Well, you're welcome to stay in my house for the time," Link said. "It looks like I'm not done fighting just yet. Still have some Yiga to deal with. Think you'll be fine here on your own?"

I nodded. "If you see my grandmother, please tell her I am strong."

"I'll tell her." He opened the door to his house and helped me inside. "But I think she already knew that."

I slipped off my shoes and sank into his bed. One day I would repay his generosity.

"Then tell her that _I_ know it too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Plot twist: Impa doesn't care about Paya's personal development. She just wants great-grandchildren. (j/k)
> 
> Hope you enjoyed the fic! Paya was fun to write.


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